Things I wish that I never gave up

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Sorry for a lack of posts, I've been struck down with endless revision... ugh. But it somehow got me thinking completely out of nowhere. Through all my boredom it made me realise there are so many things that I've done throughout my childhood that I did as hobbies, both in and outside of school, that I somehow manged to get bored and grow out of each of.

Looking back now, I wish I never gave some of them up and that I could do those things again without feeling sick to my stomach. Going back to those things can be really nerve wrecking, despite the fact that it might have been something I once loved. I mean I left for a reason right?

Despite this I do feel in the back of my head a bit of regret and guilt that I gave up so easily and didn't push myself forwards. Instead I admitted defeat. Here are some of the things I wish I never gave up.

I wish I never gave up playing netball and rounders. I was in the school team for both sports and I enjoyed it so much, I always loved the adrenaline and the thrill you get winning a match; I'm like the most competitive person ever and I'm pretty sure people hate me for it. However I always felt disheartened, because when picking the school teams, teachers always prioritized the popular girls, so trialing for the team always felt like a waste of time and energy. I eventually gave up, because I never felt like I could live up to the teachers standards. But I still love those sports so much, I just wish I could play it now, more for fun than anything else.

I went to dance lessons for a long period of time, and even though I'm not a great dancer, there's always a great feeling you get from moving to the beat of a song and feeling the rhythm in your body. The first time I quit was because I got in an argument with my best friends, I still went but it just felt so awkward so I eventually gave in because I knew inside that they were laughing at me. Despite this, I still loved dancing so I rejoined the group a year later, to find out they left (which was great news). I went for a couple of weeks but once again something didn't feel right, I just wanted to stay at home and avoid speaking or talking to anyone. It sucked. Sometimes I go onto YouTube now and watch choreography videos and want so bad to be able to dance again, but I don't think it's anything I will or could restart. I guess I'll just stick to lonely dance parties in my room.

I never took an instrument lesson in my life, I still have no idea what the grades mean and I cant for the life of me read sheet music. But I did have a keyboard that I was obsessed with, and despite my lack of musical knowledge I was good at it! I could learn to play songs with ease, and would often be found watching video tutorials on how to play the most popular song at the time to go into school the next day and play it for my friends. Music was one of my best lessons in school that I did really well in, until I had to pick my options in year 9. I couldn't take it as an option so was cut off from everything I loved. I stopped playing the keyboard and now it sits unloved on my bedroom floor, I probably can only play two songs on it now... I'm sorry Mr keyboard, I should have never given up on you. However Mr drums, I have my eyes on you...

I'll have to write a part 2 to this post because I've come to he realization that there are too many things I wish I'd stuck with. I've also come to the conclusion that I need to go out more, jeez my life is so bland and boring now! Maybe I should start yoga? Who am I kidding I'd give up on that too.

Is there anything you wish that you had never given up?

Lauren xx